Are You a DIP?

Updated: Nov 1, 2021

Everywhere I look people seem to have a furrowed brow and stuck in a rut. They go about their business feeling alone in their struggles and lost in a low spot. They seem to miss the simple opportunities to laugh amidst the challenges and connect to find strength, forgetting that there are others willing to offer support. We think we can go it alone… or should… and so we struggle alone. We see ourselves as a bother, rather than a potential gift for another to serve.

There can actually be miracles in every mess, if we train our eyes to look for possibilities rather than problems. However, it takes seeing and embracing our own self-worth.

Have you ever seen the road sign DIP, that bright yellow sign that forewarns a low spot is in the road ahead? Such a sign can be used as a as a conscious reminder it is possible to choose happiness even amidst heartache. What we sometimes do instead is isolate ourselves in our low spot by acting like a DIP – a Dysfunctionally Independent Person who believes they don’t need help, or that receiving makes them feel to vulnerable. They are far better at giving than receiving. That way they can maintain control.

Are you a DIP?


If we dare to ask and receive, rather than only give or avoid all together, we open the door to deeper connection and possibilities for collaboration.

In our busy world, depression and discontent threaten happiness in epidemic proportions. Some of us feel down. Operating on fumes, we still manage to keep a false smile. Isolation is misinterpreted as healthy independence. Dysfunctionally Independent People often use their obsessive self-sufficiency to disguise their fears and insecurities, creating their own isolation.

To get out of your DIP, reach out. Go ahead, dare to ask! Receiving and giving is a complete gift exchange. You can’t have one without the other.

Receiving or asking for help is not a selfish act, but becomes our joyful responsibility. Taking responsibility for our own joy is the greatest gift we can give another. Our willingness to connect and to ask for help from another allows them to reach beyond their own DIP-ness and into their own heart to be of service to another, causing them to experience and feel their own magnificence through such a mutual exchange of love.

When we look beyond our own pain and despair, and distract ourselves from our own despair by acknowledging another, we often receive a gift that helps to puts our own tribulations into perspective.

Our hearts feel full when we experience that we have made a difference, even if in a small and simple way and allows us to find our way back to the happiness highway! So notice the DIP and head for high ground, creating keepsake moments by both giving and receiving.

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